aggiepie's tabulas

Summing up a decade's worth of friendship into a couple of paragraphs just fails to capture the exciting, extraordinary and special experiences I have had with my friend. (It is also why my best-est friends don't have Friendster testimonials from me! I have tried, but somehow, they always fall short of the real thing.) There are just too many beautiful memories, too many crazy adventures, too much esoterica, that words fail to express (and as in Friendster's case, limited by the 1000 character quota). Pero para naman hindi customary Milo Alejo greeting, as in "HBD Lau!" ang nilalaman ng blog entry na ito, here goes my attempt at a birthday tribute for my best friend.

Lauren and I are kindred spirits! We have a lot of things in common (we even have this childhood fantasy of watching the rain while eating apples from a glass bowl--some vision we came up independent of each other, though her apples are red, and mine are green.). We like the same things (I don't even know where to start enumerating!). Fell for the same guys (Ah! I don't wanna start enumerating! ). Belong to the same circle of friends with whom we also share similar quirks (and crushes? hmmm... ). We're both "popular sanguine" (quiz result from the personality book Reylu brought to Bio 121 class), talkative, sentimental, indecisive (she's a Libra!), emotional (I'm a Cancer!), bipolar... Her UE friends who are now PGIs in our hospital would often remark of our similarities. Indeed, we are so much alike, it's pretty scary coz some introspection on her part would reveal to her what's going on inside my head. And there were instances when she could read my mind and articulate for me what I couldn't say.

But we're not clones. She hates the color orange, while I do like it now (used to hate it though). And between the two of us, Lauren is the optimistic one, the glass-half-full, door-is-open girl. (Side story: One day, we were on our way to the IB from Pav 4, when we saw Jay Villanueva coming from the CASAA and also walking to the IB. Now there's a small door at the CASAA side of IB, which is closed most of the time, but was sometimes open on lucky, random days. It is a more convenient entrance when you're coming from that side of IB, rather than having to cross the parking lot and enter through the main entrance. So Jay V. got to the door ahead of us, when we called out to him and asked, almost in unison. Lau: Bukas? Me: Sarado?). We're both selosa, but she's more giving... And forgiving, whereas I tend to hold grudges. We cry a lot, though Lau cries more than I do, and I think it's because she's got a lot more empathy in her (while I'm a hard woman now ). But when she's happy, she's very happy sha-la-la! And her energy and enthusiasm is contagious! Indeed, the world is a brighter place because of her.

 HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAUIELAUSWEETLAU! ♥♥♥♥

"Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves." - Sir James Barrie

I'm in an internet shop across the street from my school, whiling away the hours, until my triage post at the ER at 2 am... Or until the Burn Unit calls for BE/IV insertion... Or until somebody gets flamed/scalded/electrocuted and seeks consult at the ER.

I am on Burn duty.

If only it weren't raining, then I would be staying at my dorm, a good 3 blocks away from the hospital. But it IS raining. And I'm too lazy to carry an umbrella, nor do I wanna trample over puddles and get pesky little mud speckles all over my med whites.

So I've been staying at the callroom, doing nothing (well, except for munch on chips and guzzle C2 iced tea). And now I'm bored, so I decided to go out for a while. And here I am.

Burn is benign and fun! Ok, so we were busy during the earlier days of Burn rotation, what with the division conference, and case presentation, and journal reporting. But we were just busy and not really toxic! And after those things were over, we've been having a blast! Been waking up 7-ish for the past couple of days, and since I don't have any patients slated for OR, I would spend entire mornings in bed.  Would report to the hospital in the pm, during which we clean and dress the wounds of burn patients who are on followup at the OPD. One time, there was a patient with second and third degree burns covering the both of his legs, right arm, abdomen and back, and it took 7 of us (5 interns + 1 resident + 1 surgery pre-resident) to clean his wounds and dress him. It was a team-building activity!

I could get used to waking up late. But I shouldn't. Since I'll be rotating in Neurosurgery next, where rounds start at 5:30 am.

He was the first man in my life. He who gave me my name (both surname and first name! since he was the one who came up with the name "Agnes", after a doctor he knew... perhaps a portent of things to come), my life and all the love in the world! From whom I got my button nose and small ears (and propensity to become obese ). Who carried me on his back. Who brought me with him on his morning bicycle rides; first, in a little basket (you know those wiry baskets that come attached to a bike's handlebars), on top of the veggies; and when I got older, he attached a small wooden chair to the bike so I could still come with him whenever he bought pan de sal in the mornings. When I got way older and bigger to fit even in the little wooden chair, he dismantled the bike and re-assembled it, adjusted to my height, and now it's MY bike!

He bought me my rollerskates and he'd bring me to Camp John Hay, where together we learned to skate, and we skated til our butts were black and blue from all the falling. He's very good at Chess, and he taught me to read chess terms: PK4, PQ3, etc. though I never mastered the game.

He believed in the importance of having a good education (he's still financing my studies up to now! hehe ). His favorite subject was Math. He taught me how the multiplication table works. He'd churn up these 3-5 digit figures for me to add/subtract/multiply/divide. And showed me how to use a calculator to check for my answers. He illustrated to me the differences of equilateral and isosceles and scalene triangles, of trapezoids, trapezium and rhomboids (and this was in first grade!). He taught me fractions and decimals. We'd pore over word problems and he'd patiently explain to me how to compute for area and volume, principal and interest, etc. He Taught me how to spell, yet whenever I'd ask him the meaning of a word, he'd encourage me to use the dictionary instead. He was my playmate at Boggle. And it was he who showed me how to use the typewriter correctly, with the right fingers on the right keys.

He bought me my first watch, a Mickey Mouse watch, with the mouse's hands going off at goniometrically impossible angles. Taught me how to tell the time... and instilled in me the value of it. In the 30 years that he worked for the bank, he was never late, not once. He didn't even come on time, at the latest, he was 15 minutes ahead of time.

He's honest, responsible and hardworking. He's such a workaholic, sometimes too hardworking for his own good. He had a CVA in April of last year, but he's a survivor and has regained full functional capacity since. Not even the residuals could stop him from going back to work...  

Even when at home, he'd always find something to do, whether it is cleaning the car, or washing the windows, or watering the plants... He's also a good cook , better than Mom! His specialty was some kind of sweet meat, to which he added spite, este, Sprite. He loves to sing!  Favorite songs include: "My Way" and "The Impossible Dream".

Today, he's turning 53.

Happy birthday Daddy! I love you. ♥♥♥♥
* * * * *

Another "D" person celebrating her birthday today is one my best-est friends  (yah, I've got lots of them!) This girl and I have been through a lot... a HELL OF A LOT! (And the devil's name is... j/k ) I knew her in 1st year HS as the one with the impressive "Book of Myself" replete with hifalutin terms. Made her do my Soc. Sci. essay when she was joining SK in 2nd year. Got to know her more when we became classmates in 3rd year, and since then, we've become very good friends. In college, however, we got into this twisted love triangle, followed by 5 months of the silent treatment... But in the end, our friendship proved to be stronger than that.

These days, though, I barely get to see. Nor talk to her on the phone. And I miss her lots. (Didn't even make it to her dinner last night ...so sorry honey! was too tired.  I fell asleep right after texting you, and woke up the ff day, still in my med whites. Yak!  ). But I hope your day was a blast. And I hope to see you soon. Happy birthday Dawnie! Luv you lots! *mwah*

"I wake up every mornin'; I stumble out of bed; Stretchin' and yawnin'; Another day ahead." - Sheena Easton's "Morning Train" (Nine to Five)

Every morning is like that, since I have to be at the hospital by 7 am. The past week though has seen me getting up earlier than usual... and with great difficulty! You see I was in NSS aka Neurosurgery (though I wonder what the extra "S" stands for) and rounds begin at 5:30 am.

Rounds start at the NSS ICU, and then the NSS ward, and through the wards of other departments with co-managed patients--Neuro ICU, PACU, Burn, ENT, Pedia, Neuro ward, Trauma. We end at the ER, usually 9-ish. It's just the rounds that's toxic actually, but the residents teach us and the learning we gain along the way more than makes up for it.

OPD consults are held on Wednesday morning, and Thursday and Friday afternoons. I only got to attend the Wednesday OPD day coz I was at the OR on the other 2 days. Most of the Pts we get at the OPD are babies with hydrocephalus.

On Thursday, I assisted in a VP shunting/aneurysmal clipping procedure of Dr. Lagapa and Dr. Encanto. It was pretty exciting coz they actually *trusted* me to drill a couple of holes through the patient's skull.  The Hudson brace (skull-drilling device) has a locking mechanism that automatically stops the drill once the dura mater has been exposed (so you don't have to worry about drilling through the brain matter!).  I wasn't able to try the Gigli wire though, to saw through the skull. Dr. L proceeded to clip the aneurysm under the microscope , a procedure that especially requires an intact cerebellum, fine finger adroitness and good hand-eye coordination. Cool!  After which, when Dr. E closed the surgical site, he made me cauterize the bleeders and staple the skin.

Friday. We had the Neurosciences department conference in the AM. Drs. Rivera and Valencia gave an interesting talk on Moyamoya disease (it's Japanese, meaning a "puff of smoke", because that is how the abnormal vascular collaterals appear on angiography... like a puff of smoke! ) Assisted in another VPS procedure, this time with Dr. Pioquinto. Took her just 15 minutes to insert the shunt.

Saturday. Missed earlier part of AM rounds for Dr. Consunji's lecture on sepsis (Interesting article here on sepsis management ). He's so galing! He lectured for more than 2 hours, but I was able to absorb it all. Was able to catch up with rounds after the lecture. Dr. E showed a scan of a Pt who had a stroke. The brain could swell and the increased intracranial pressure would cause it to herniate. NSS was on board coz once that happens, they would have to perform a craniectomy (take out a piece of the skull) to allow for the brain to expand outward (and not through the brainstem). The resected piece of skull  can be deposited in the Bone Bank, or a small pocket can be made amongst the abdominal muscles where the bone is kept, until such time that the brain swelling has subsided and bone can be pieced back onto the skull...

Neurosurgery is so interesting! If only I had the manual dexterity, and the physical stamina for surgery training...  And the residents are verrry nice!  They even treated us to lunch at Hacienda Ristorante after the Saturday AM rounds. Lunch convo revolved around NSS topics, including a cow with hydrocephalus!

I chosed NSS for my subspec rotation coz I intend to go into Neurology. And I'm glad I did. I had so much fun and I learned a lot during my 1 week rotation in their division. But I can do without the 5:30 rounds!

Just one of those touchy-feely email fwds I wanna share.

The Paradox of Our Time
(Author Unknown)

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less.

We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; we have more degrees, but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.

We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life; we've added years to life, not life to years.

We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor. We've conquered outer space, but not inner space; we've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; we've split the atom, but not our prejudice; we write more, but learn less; we plan more, but accomplish less.

We've learned to rush, but not to wait; we have higher incomes, but lower morals; we have more food, but less appeasement; we build more computers to hold more information to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication; we've become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men, and short character; steep profits, and shallow relationships. These are the times of world peace (?), but domestic warfare; more leisure, but less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition. These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes.

These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throw away morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.

It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom; a time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to make a difference, or to just hit delete...

Am now in ORL aka Otorhinolaryngology, which is what was left of EENT after the first E broke off to become Ophtha. Was on duty at the ER yesterday until this morning. Had 11 consults... not bad.  Was even able to sleep for a couple of hours, from 3-5 am. Some of the cases we had yday were: a boy who had a mandibular fracture; an old woman who yawned so big  that her temporomandibular joint (jaw joint) got displaced and her jaw locked; an old man who cleaned his ears with a matchstick when it broke, leaving a piece of it stuck inside his ear; a little boy who inserted a gun pellet inside his ear; a baby who swallowed an open safety pin; and a woman who had a cockroach inside her ear...  It was an adolescent cockroach, not a gigantic adult, but big enough that it baffles me how the insect insinuated itself inside the patient's tiny ear canal; we even had to take it out piecemeal! And exciting ng buhay ko noh?!

Got the afternoon off. Slept for the most part of it, and now I'm so awake!

Unremarkable day at the ENT OPD. Peered through several pairs of ears. Poked at people's noses. Looked down at their throats ... and induced some gag reflexes in the process.

In the tradition of shifting out pakain, Mark and I treated our beloved NSS residents to dinner at Dencio's. NSS rotation wouldn't have been as fun if it weren't for them lovely people. There was lots of food, and I drowned myself in bottomless iced tea... 5 refills of it!  

Yay! My counter has now reached 10,000++ hits! Thanks to you my dear loyal readers , and to those who have accidentally stumbled upon my blog.

Can't log in to myshoutbox account.

Twisted now online!

RV had a patient who originally consulted for an ear problem. On routine physical exam, however, his heart ♥ sounds were auscultated on the right.. The patient has DEXTROCARDIA! (dextra, right + cardia, heart)

Cool!

In 3 days, I watched 3 different *hanguk yonghwa* of varied themes. One was a romcom, another was a period movie and the third was an action-comedy. But all of them had Ahn Sung Ki, the "thousand-year-old-man-with-a-dayum-hot-body" (according to some soompi poster). I did not intend on an ASK marathon; it just happened. *lol*

"The Romantic President" (starring Ahn Sung Ki, Choi Ji Woo, Im Soo Jung) was the first of the 3 ASK flicks I watched, and one with an already finished review, so I'm posting it here. The others are still unfinished, stored in my hard drive (and in my head).

Agaphei lent me her copy of TRP. She and Russel raised my expectations of the movie; Phoebe doused them. So when I saw the movie, I initially found it cute and funny, and thought "Hey, it isn't so bad as Phoebe said it was". Or perhaps because she has lowered my standards for it.

It *was* funny, when ASK was hanging out with the vagrants, much to the dismay and then later embarrassment of a self-righteous security guard, and when Ji Woo called up Im Soo Jung's dad to report his daughter's misbehavior, and found herself calling up the President's Office. And it *was* cute, when ASK was telling the truth about his "homework being blown by the wind", and when ASK and Ji Woo were arguing over some line of "The Oriole Song".

But these were all lumped at the beginning, and pretty soon, the movie ran dry of these cute and funny moments. I guess it started to go downhill with ASK's poor rendition of a Michael Jackson. And then he started conducting himself in a manner unbecoming of a President, not just any president, not even a chaebol president, but a country president! It's ok to let one's hair down once in a while, but that "escape" from his bodyguards was pretty draggy. The bodygaurds supposed to be the best ones, protecting the most powerful man in the country, yet 2 lovestruck people were able to slip away from their scrutiny.

The love story between ASK and Ji Woo was poorly developed, as well as the relationship betwen Ji Woo and ISJ (in contrast to sisterly the sisterly love that blossomed between Minjee and Yongsoo in "Beautiful Days" ). There were also a couple of subplots--one with ISJ's guy friend (was that you, Lee Beum Soo?!?! Internet resources say that you were also part of this movie's cast, but I don't recognize you as the policeman/investigator in "Making It Big". )  ; the other with Ji Woo's transvestite roommate--that tie up loosely with the main story, taking away precious airtime for the development of the main characters' love story, and being poorly developed subplots themselves.

It's refreshing to see Ji Woo in a cheerful role. And Im So Jung's cute! The first couple of times I've seen her (in "A Tale of Two Sisters" and "...Ing"  )  , she had short hair, so I didn't recognize her right away. I thought "Hey! She looks like Im Soo Jung, only she has long hair." It was only when Phoebe texted that I got confirmation: She looks like Im Soo Jung, because she *is* Im Soo Jung!

As for Ahn Sung Ki, I can see what "soompi poster" meant by her remark (though there were no bod exposures, and NOT to my disappointment). And to borrow Phoebe's words: "Not the best bod, not KSW-level, but for someone in his 50s? 60s? not bad indeed. Heh. =)" He had some funny moments during the movie, but more corny ones; the latter through no fault of his (except for the Michael Jackson bit, but I don't know, should I be expecting someone in his 50s? 60s? to do the moonwalk?).

"The Romantic President" even failed to meet my already low expectations. It tried to cram in too much stuff. There were too many things going on, too trying to be funny... that it fell flat. Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

(This piece was written during yesterday's duty at the ER.)

This morning, it took more than the already huge effort it takes to haul myself out of bed.  It's a cold rainy day. Perfect weather for staying in bed, and burrowing under the sheets, and sleeping. One big BUT: I’m on duty.

On the brighter side of things, however, the cold would help dissipate the heat in the ER. The aircon's broken... again! (poor overworked aircon... like everything and everybody else in the hospital is) So instead of centralized airconditioning, we get centralized heating.  (Grant was actually soaked during his duty last Wednesday.)

And then such weather would discourage people from going out of their homes and getting into accidents (although being at home is no guarantee against mishaps, e.g. this one patient of KSS’s who screamed at the sight of a rat, and a pin loosely tacked on the wall, perhaps shaken by the sound energy she produced, fell bull’s eye into her mouth and got lodged in her esophagus ).

So while there aren't any consults yet today, I'm listing my favorite rainy day activities aka “things-I-wish-I-were-doing-now-but-since-I-am-on-duty-all-I-can-do-is-write-them-down.” I could be using this time to study though, but it seems that whenever I open my book to read, a patient suddenly arrives.

Favorite things to do on a rainy day.

1. SLEEP! A perennial favorite, not just a seasonal one.

2. Get warm and fuzzy. Dress up in a pair of pjs. I have a couple of favorites for such cold weather. They’re both flannel, warm, fuzzy, pink and with bear prints (the one with small white bears was a gift from Charisse 2 Christmases ago; the other has big brown bears and was a Christmas gift from Phoebe last year). Wear socks (like the ones Lauren got me during her trip to Baguio a few years ago!). Burrow under thick "Baguio" blankets (mine's pink with yellow smileys, given to me by Johann 4 years ago).

3. Curl up in bed. With a steaming cup of hot cocoa, or white choco mocha... basta chocolate-based drink! Read a good book. Or watch a nice *hanguk yonghwa ddonun doorama*. Melodramas are especially perfect for such maudlin weather. Personal recommends are: Il Mare, Hur Jin Ho's movies (Christmas in August, One Fine Spring Day) and Yoon Seok Ho's Season Dramas... except for Winter Sonata maybe, coz the snow might only make one colder (though the story will warm the heart ). Summer Scent's particularly nice; it features the rain and the cinematography’s so pretty, and I am biased.

3. Eat champorado.

4. Eat apples from a glass bowl, while watching the rain from a big window--a childhood fantasy I share with Lau.

5. Make paperboats, as inspired by Batibot.

6. Telebabad... with Phoebe!

7. Have a long, hot shower.

8. Run in the rain. When I was kid, this little pipe dream even included details of a white dress (wedding dress?), bare feet and green grass (the kind of stuff movies are made of ). Now that I’m older, I just wanna run in the rain (like Son Ye Jin in The Classic ). In non-diaphanous clothes. And with shoes that will protect my feet from leptospires.

One year ago today, I spent the weekend at Phoebe’s. It was a 3-day weekend, and it was her birthday, and Lexi was also there to celebrate. The 3 of us watched "Beautiful Days". (It was really nice of Lex to have stayed even if she has already seen BD. ) I only knew Choi Ji Woo from "Winter Sonata", whose surname I pronounced then as "Choy". Ryu Si Won was the guy in "The Truth" who looked like Paco A. (not Arespacochaga), but I couldn’t even pronounce his name; Lexi was patient though and she enunciated the syllables very slowly for me: "Repeat after me. Ryu. Si. Won." Mixed up Minjee and Minchul. Couldn’t remember the name Yong Soo (the only names that stuck to me then were Yang Mei Mei, Zena, Zero and San Jae, because they were fairly easy. --> Pibiya's email reply: Aww. Kunbe!  My usual know-it-all erratum: It's Yeon Soo, not Yong Soo. It's Sae Na, not Zena the Warrior Princess.  And after thinking it's San Jae for almost 2 years, apparently, it's Soon Jae pala. I don't blame you for being confused though--pinanood kasi natin Chinese version yung names nila kaya ang gulo-gulo. ). Lee Byung Hun seemed plain. And no, I wasn’t initially smitten by the shoulder-raising, kind-hearted, yet "boring musician." (copyright@Tita Leslie B.)

Fast forward 1 year later.

And 26 24 episodes (hours) of "Beautiful Days". 20 episodes of "Stairway to Heaven". 20 episodes of "Summer Scent". 20 episodes of "Lovers in Paris". 16 episodes of "Sweet 18". 20 episodes of "What Happened in Bali". 16 episodes of "Let’s Go to School, Sangdoo". 20 episodes of "Winter Sonata". 12 episodes of "Delicious Proposal" (4 more eps and I’m done with this series).

32 Korean movies ("My Sassy Girl" is not included though, as I have seen it 3 years ago, long before the hallyu. Thanks to Dawn who shared it with me, and Leo who was the source for it.)

RERUNS NOT INCLUDED.

Torn between Kwon Sang Woo, Lee Dong Gun, Bae Yong Jun, Jung Woo Seung, Jo In Sung, Won Bin, etc. etc. Realized that Lee Byung Hun is cute and charming and a brilliant actor. Still not smitten by RSW.

Joined soompi, lost a few posts to the Crash of 05, re-registered again and even started a thread

Developed a taste for kimchi and bulgogi. Looking forward to feasting with Lexi and Phoebe

Discovered Meo. Got obsessed with CD cases.

Converted Dyan and Vi; and Marlene, who converted Mamay, and Queenie and Loffy and Daf. Yet my success story is Chey, who went from completely hating LDG in Lovers in Paris, to adoring him in Sweet 18.

Could now read and write hanguk characters, but seldom do I know the meaning of what I've read, and still confused with pronunciation and romanization. But I now know several Korean words, including "shibbal".

Laughed. Cried. Fell in luv. Downloaded. Burned. And wrote stupid reviews.

Frequent talks and txt-changes and emails with Phoebe and Lex. I know our friendship goes beyond the hallyu, but it’s just nice that we have *another* something in common. Surfing the Korean wave is much more fun when with friends. And we laugh harder, cry harder, and fall in luv all the more.

행복한 기념일!

With Czechoslovakia's (...) split up into Czech Republic and Slovakia, we have to move on: "C's zany! Eventually chosed himself. Recently, every person uncovered B's lies in college. Sometimes, love only vanishes away. K in agony!"

From "Warrior of the Light", a www.paulocoelho.com.br publication.

One always has to know when a stage comes to an end. If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through. Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters - whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished.

Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship come to an end? Did you leave your parents' house? Gone to live abroad? Has a long lasting friendship ended all of a sudden? You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened. You can tell yourself you won't take another step until you find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life have turned into dust, just like that. But such an attitude will be awfully stressing for everyone involved: your parents, your husband or wife, your friends, your children, your sister, everyone will be finishing chapters, turning over new leaves, getting on with life, and they will all feel bad seeing you at a standstill. None of us can be in the present and the past at the same time, not even when we try to understand the things that happen to us. What has passed will not return: we cannot for ever be children, late adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair with someone who has gone away and has not the least intention of coming back. Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away.

That is why it is so important (however painful it may be!) to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of things away to orphanages, sell or donate the books you have at home. Everything in this visible world is a manifestation of the invisible world, of what is going on in our hearts and getting rid of certain memories also means making some room for other memories to take their place. Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else.

Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love relationships that are broken off, work that is promised but there is no starting date, decisions that are always put off waiting for the "ideal moment." Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to be finished: tell yourself that what has passed will never come back. Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person - nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need. This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult, but it is very important.

Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.